Hey. Been awhile. Pardon for the absence.

I was actually planning on abandoning this blog. I tried to write a lot on Tumblr but it's way fast that's why I guess I'm going back to you, my little friend.

Been a little depressed right naw. Blame him. Or no wait, BLAME ME.

Blame me for being considerate - SO considerate. for loving too much. for everything. It's my fault because i know it's going to happen yet I didn't find a way to actually make something to NOT make it happen. doesn't quite make any sense but uhhh, who cares? You got the point, i know that.

He's just really annoying. I am a girl, he should know that. I want to be assured that I am loved, I want consistency and I want it baad. Not because I am an asshole and I only want things for myself but because it's distance that we're against, it's love that we're fighting for (or is it?) :( I don't get it. How can he be here today, and be gone the other day? How can he suddenly be cold then be sweet after? It's like, when I decide to let go, that's the point where he's giving me reasons to hold on. And I don't want that. :( It scares the shit out of me.

Of all people, I wanted him to be the one who'll always be there for me, distance aside. I want him to fight for us, but it seems like I'm the only serious one in this relationship. No, wait, scratch that. We don't have any relationship. Just understandings and stuff, but I guess those things are enough to fight for what we feel, right? Or for what I feel... Cause i'm not really suire about what he feels about me anymore.

Maybe, it's time to finally let go. For the last time. It's so hard to shed a tear every now and then for the same old fuckin' reasons. I'm sad. mad. and everything. I just want to end this.

So.. can we please just end this?

It's such a pain when they send me stuff with your name. Such a pain because I feel so stupid, like i'm running and chasing after you like some kind of a freakin' bitch. I don't want this.. feeling. It's like i'm an option, not a priority. And I hate that. Because I have always been the option. The Option.

Fckyeah.

-- when silence is torn, the night is broken.

 Hey. Been awhile. Pardon for the absence.

I was actually planning on abandoning this blog. I tried to write a lot on Tumblr but it's way fast that's why I guess I'm going back to you, my little friend.

Been a little depressed right naw. Blame him. Or no wait, BLAME ME.

Blame me for being considerate - SO considerate. for loving too much. for everything. It's my fault because i know it's going to happen yet I didn't find a way to actually make something to NOT make it happen. doesn't quite make any sense but uhhh, who cares? You got the point, i know that.

He's just really annoying. I am a girl, he should know that. I want to be assured that I am loved, I want consistency and I want it baad. Not because I am an asshole and I only want things for myself but because it's distance that we're against, it's love that we're fighting for (or is it?) :( I don't get it. How can he be here today, and be gone the other day? How can he suddenly be cold then be sweet after? It's like, when I decide to let go, that's the point where he's giving me reasons to hold on. And I don't want that. :( It scares the shit out of me.

Of all people, I wanted him to be the one who'll always be there for me, distance aside. I want him to fight for us, but it seems like I'm the only serious one in this relationship. No, wait, scratch that. We don't have any relationship. Just understandings and stuff, but I guess those things are enough to fight for what we feel, right? Or for what I feel... Cause i'm not really suire about what he feels about me anymore.

Maybe, it's time to finally let go. For the last time. It's so hard to shed a tear every now and then for the same old fuckin' reasons. I'm sad. mad. and everything. I just want to end this.

So.. can we please just end this?

It's such a pain when they send me stuff with your name. Such a pain because I feel so stupid, like i'm running and chasing after you like some kind of a freakin' bitch. I don't want this.. feeling. It's like i'm an option, not a priority. And I hate that. Because I have always been the option. The Option.

Fckyeah.

-- when silence is torn, the night is broken.